One of the greatest joys of the holiday season is being with people we care about. Sadly, people who care about each other are often afraid of speaking up about problems when they get together. Unfortunately, NOT setting boundaries is likely to lead to even more upset!
The Kidpower 3-Step Boundary Path provides a useful tool for preparing to speak up in ways that are clear, respectful, and more likely to be effective. Here are the steps:
1: CONNECT – Acknowledge the other person’s point of value and/or importance to you. For example, I understand how busy you are.. (Or, “I like spending time with you…)
2: SHARE – State your feelings and concerns in a simple, specific way that does NOT attack their character or intentions, starting with the word ‘and’ which is usually more effective than ‘but” in this situation: AND, I am feeling stressed because I don’t want us to be late. (Or, AND, I feel frustrated when you keep texting at dinner.)
3: ASK – State what you want the other person to do or not do in ways that are clear, respectful, and possible for them to act on. “I would very much appreciate it if you would interrupt what you are doing so we can get ready to leave.” (Or, “Please put your phone away when we are having a meal.”)
This downloadable one-page overview of The Kidpower 3-Step Boundary Path includes examples you can practice with kids as well!
Podcast: Healthy Boundaries for the Holidays
Are you feeling stressed about the holidays?
Are you worried about conflicts with family members or friends causing problems?
Do you have a hard time balancing your work life and your personal life?
Every person who has listened to our Workplace Options podcast interview Setting Healthy Boundaries for the Holidays, or read the transcript, says they have found solutions for these issues and more!
Keeping Kids Safe During the Holidays
These Kidpower resources have helped many families avoid pitfalls that get in the way of having a happy, fun holiday.
All gifts will be doubled!
Thanks to our generous Leadership Circle all donations through December 31 will be doubled!
When you make a gift to Kidpower, you’re supporting the 50,000 children, teens, and vulnerable adults who will learn Kidpower skills in 2025 to increase their confidence, improve their relationships, and take charge of their safety!
Holiday Book Sale - 50% OFF!
All e-books in the Kidpower Online Learning Center are 50% OFF now through December 31st.
Thanks for being such an important part of our community! We hope this sale adds a little extra joy to your season.
Email us at safety@kidpower.org if you have questions to ask or safety skill stories to share. We will always be happy to hear from you!
Published: December 17, 2024 | Last Updated: December 17, 2024
Irene van der Zande, Kidpower Founder and Executive Director
Kidpower Founder and Executive Irene van der Zande is a master at teaching safety through stories and practices and at inspiring others to do the same. Her child protection and personal safety expertise has been featured by USA Today, CNN, Today Moms, the LA Times, and The Wall Street Journal. Publications include: cartoon-illustrated Kidpower Safety Comics and Kidpower Teaching Books curriculum; Bullying: What Adults Need to Know and Do to Keep Kids Safe; the Relationship Safety Skills Handbook for Teens and Adults; Earliest Teachable Moment: Personal Safety for Babies, Toddlers, and Preschoolers; The Kidpower Book for Caring Adults: Personal Safety, Self-Protection, Confidence, and Advocacy for Young People, and the Amazon Best Seller Doing Right by Our Kids: Protecting Child Safety at All Levels.